not that every page is filled, but regardless this 283 + 138 pages of self typed notes are making me breathless omfg
We’re very quiet.
It’s peaceful sitting here, not speaking.
It’s this stillness we both love.
concluded that instagram was taking up way too much of my life just getting curious and sometimes envious over what others (mostly strangers, actually) are doing and EATING and so I’ve decided to delete the app entirely from my phone - because I can (!!)
breaks will mean cooking, running, news reading and practicing my p
^part of my plans in attempt to fix my bullshit!!
today made me realise that people>everything else
as much as at the end of the day I feel terrible for not completing enough, I’ am only feeling terrible because I didn’t finish what I set out to do, but never because I had (or “wanted” would be a better word for this) to spend time with/on you (guys).
you are loved, you are loved (-:
[also it’s almost less than 100 days and I see everyone around fighting v hard in our own ways - in essence it’s a battle w ourselves so 朋友们不要放弃]
THEORIES ABOUT THE UNIVERSE
I am trying to see things in perspective.
My dog wants a bite of my peanut butter
chocolate chip bagel. I know she cannot
have this, because chocolate makes dogs
very sick. My dog does not understand this.
She pouts and wraps herself around my leg
like a scarf and purrs and tries to convince me
to give her just a tiny bit. When I do not give in,
she eventually gives up and lays in the corner,
under the piano, drooping and sad. I hope the
universe has my best interest in mind like I have
my dogs. When I want something with my whole
being, and the universe withholds it from me,
I hope the universe thinks to herself: "Silly girl.
She thinks this is what she wants, but she
does not understand how it will hurt.
don’t know what came over me today - could only crawl out of bed at 12noon when on usual fridays my classes would have just ended
no excuse. everyone’s going to school why are you so easily exhausted )-: (okay at least I did substantial amount of h3 today?)
12.12am two more essays to write before I sleep and prepare myself for some four hour class followed by practice on an early saturday morning - so intense and the f word keeps running through my head
end of july your BT2s are so bad get your shit together girl